A pregnant bride

[Monica]

My friend Ann is a pregnant bride, she is sure that being pregnant at wedding is a source of shame, they couldn`t delay the wedding day while the child is born-there are some reasons, she worries very much about it, Please, Help! How to explain to her that she can still plan the dream wedding and don`t be ashamed of bulging belly

[Sherrie]

Hi Monica,

Sometimes our beliefs are deeply held, so I'm not sure what to say to help your friend. I was pregnant when I got married and this was more 20 years ago. I was a regular church goer and got married in my church. I look back at those pictures and I see my friends and family and my baptist pastor around me supporting and celebrating with me. That was 20 years ago when it was a bit tougher even to do that. Remind her that those people who love her are not judging her. And anyone who judges her isn't important, well their opoinion just isn't important. And most of all, stop judging herself. I was a beautiful bride and had a beautiful daughter all those year s ago and today I wouldn't change a thing. I know now that in essence I was a role model for others when I proudly walked down the aisle with my little daughter, who is such a blessing today, in my tummy sharing my day! So tell her to celebrate her wedding and the awesome new life she is bringing into the world and never look back.

[Antonio R. Gallemit Sr.]

For bride who desired to be chaste before wedding would naturally feel embarrassed, especially if she made that commitment to herself, parents or God. If she grew in a behaved family of virgin-till-marriage, then she would naturally feel very guilty but what can that do to herself and the wedding. And if she is has brothers who are behaved in this matter that makes it very heavy for her to handle. The best thing she can do is ask for their forgiveness and understanding. The remorse will keep bagging her once it is not confessed, especially to the parents who may have taught her since she was yet a girl, and have been reminding her to be careful in getting into engagements. I am a father, I want my daughters to give me clean reputation when they enter into marriage. But what will I do when the expected thing does not come the way it should? My daughter is still more important to me than anything else. Despite the disappointment I will get from her failure to keep her promise, I will the more stand behind her in what she is going through. And just like the advise of others, I tell her to ignore those who may find judging her. She should not be ashame to show people that felt so sorry about her pregnancy, instead ask them to help her in her situation. I don't believe people will that easily judge a sincere and repentant pregnant bride. I can be certain that they will be more sympathetic to her than passing her judgement. What can be worse and heart-hardening is if she pretend s before everyone that she is not pregnant. Above all, the God He failed to please will understand if she wholeheartedly felr sorry. Tony & Joy Gallemit [e-mail]

[Sherrie]

I feel sorry for anyone who has people who feel this way surrounding her. I tell her stop worrying about what anybody thinks, don't repent as you have done nothing wrong - love is good - rejoice and celebrate in your new happy life.

[Marenil]

Helo Monica!

For me, theres nothing wrong to be a pregnant bride, the baby from her womb is a blessing that she must thank to God. All she have to do is to accept the reality and be happy on their wedding day.